Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Yuppie Pumpkins

As I walked in to the super market (I'm there every darn day, I can't seem to buy enough food to last more than 24 hrs. Everything is one serving, regardless of the packaging. Seriously, what man can eat two graham crackers and call it a day? I ingest them by the sleeve) Anyway I was blindsided by discriminatory pumpkin acts.


These hardworking pumpkins were labeled as $5.99. Obviously cast in to the role of the "middle class" by there monetary stature. The ones to the left were $3.99. I suppose these must be the 'blue collar" working stiffs. To the right, slightly elevated were the $7.99 variety, these I determined were the upwardly mobile yuppie pumpkins. Who makes these decisions? Who's to say one pumpkin is better than the other. Given the opportunity, can't all pumpkins achieve greatness?

Monday, September 28, 2009

Stalker Cat

My buddies cat stalks me, well at least my shoes. It's a little disturbing. This dude literally smears his body all over my shoes, and then sticks his head in all the way to the toes. I feel violated every time I go over to watch football.

Look at him, he's all worn out from the "Act". As if my shoe wants to cuddle after it was just involuntarily ravaged by that beast.





Please Snuggie don't Hurt 'Em

I'll have to say they are quite comfortable. With a few modifications there could be the cycling snuggie, or perhaps the crotchless, sex snuggie.




After closer inspection, they are really just modified MC Hammer pants.



Tuesday, September 22, 2009

My First Born

I've conceded to the fact that a new computer or puppy will be the closest thing to a child in my life, so here are the birth pictures.

Here is the vessel that carried my firstborn all the way from China.


Okay athletic stance now pushhhh!!!!

It looks so cute. Now time to smack it's ass, the power on stage.


Instead of crying you get hyper-real graphics and music that just makes you feel good.

And now the messy after-birth.


Monday, September 21, 2009

Electronics Slayer

So in the last month I have killed the following electronics

Garmin Edge 705 - Screen went out - Warranty New Unit

Ipod Classic 80 GB - Battery - Warranty New Unit

Gateway Laptop - after 7 years the crushing weight of porn finally buckled the legs of this thing, oh and I dropped it a couple of times.

So now I am a Mac the journey from peripherals to machine is complete. My new MacBook Pro should arrive Wednesday. Step one in the Blue Room Diaries is complete, next digital SLR camera. I've already thought genre organizations for the book romance, gay/lesbian, jokes, random.

Fractal Geometry

So in a sense Fractal Geometry could be looked at as the deeper you dig the more it is the same. The pattern just keeps repeating itself in smaller iterations. It's cool stuff the more you think about it. Dare I be so bold to state that the more fractaly aligned you are, the more susceptible you will be to natural selection. I'm just saying natural patterns repeat themselves because they work, sure a species may roughen up the edge and surf the breaking randomnes, but the crushing gravitational pushing power of the mass that is the fractal will just pulverize you eventually! Don't see much dinosaurs around do you. However, you do see a lot of dinosaur bicycles around. Ah yes, ignorance can repel almost anything, even the inevitable.

Thursday, September 17, 2009

Fleet of Foot

I would like you all to know, I am now running MFK. No longer am I cycling MFK. (at least until the not to distant future) I ran yesterday and was pleasantly surprised I could actually do it (much like sex) Anyway, the last time I ran was a year ago yesterday. Consequently that was also the day that confirmed I needed to have my knee scraped of all of it's taco salad chicken mush.

I'm still amazed that I can ride a bike for 6 hours with little or no apparent fatigue, but 20 minutes of running systematically strips every muscle from my legs and hangs it on a drying rack.

My ego is up there as well after watching pretty much the entire CAT 1 field pass me at the Fall Classic Last weekend, at least I beat all the pro-women (all three of them)

Monday, September 14, 2009

Dueling Hand Puppets

I'm a having a hand puppet fight. Right know my right hand is winning. (Yes it is stronger due to various extra-curricular activities) I'd take a picture but my hands are fighting. I'm typing this with my toes.

Friday, September 11, 2009

This is what workings like

Sorry I've been a little negligent on the posting front, I've actually been doing my job. Bad for the readers, but I guess I'm not going to get laid off this month. More importantly the destiny of Denver IKEA is partially in my hands. I need a new couch, and well new everything, so I need a new IKEA locally. I figure I'll give it the full MFK treatment. A couple of things though, the metric system sucks, what is an Automatic Baby Changer shown in the rest-rooms, why do they have an area programmed as "open-the-wallet", and Sweedish people can't use Auto-CAD to save their life, why are they even using CAD? It is so 80's.

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

People of Wal-Mart

After viewing peopleofwalmart.com, I've realized Blue Room Diaries has a real chance. I'm going to start securing the start up materials. A good digital SLR camera, hand sanitizer, a web presence, and my network of poo-house providers. You know that all it is going to take is A $100 bill to the driver of the honey-wagon and he will give you unlimited access to all the construction sites in the city.

My SuperBall

I found a superball at Winter Park Saturday before the race. It hasn't left my pocket since Saturday. I tell you what these things are fun, especially for someone that has absolutely nothing to do. I really got it going yesterday on my street. I almost did a diving save to keep it out of the storm sewer. It bounces really well on the tile floor of my office rest room.